I was walking down the street and it was raining.

I had just broken up with my girlfriend and needed to take a walk to clear my head. At first, all I could see were grey clouds, then something caught my eye. It felt like someone had reached into the back of me and pulled out a cold shard of ice. The rain stopped for that moment as you walked by- this woman in black who looked so sad but beautiful at the same time- and everything froze inside me until you were gone again.

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It was sunny and I had just broken up with my girlfriend. All the sudden, I saw this woman in the distance. She was walking towards me on the opposite side of the street, and as she came closer I noticed that it wasn’t just rain drops falling down her dark hair- but tears too. For a moment everything felt so still – like no one spoke or moved around us- then you passed by without even noticing me there standing at the crosswalk in your way.

I couldn’t see your face because you were looking straight ahead, not bothering to acknowledge anyone who might have been passing by. But for just a few seconds I stood there frozen watching as people walked past on either side of you before turning away into my coffee shop across from where we met up again moments ago.

So when we first met up at our coffee shop and struck up a conversation, it was clear from your body language how closed off you were with me. You weren’t interested in making new friends or being vulnerable- not even acquaintances.

When I first saw you, I realized that there are so many women in the world who deserve to be seen.

I could tell right away that nothing would happen between us because of those walls but still I persisted and invited myself for lunch where we traded stories about life over pizza slices and ginger ale cocktails, laughing as if everything was normal on both ends while all along knowing this would never last longer than just one night.When I first saw you, my heart broke into pieces for you.

Why do you have to be so guarded? Do you think the world is just going to attack and squeeze out every last ounce of your strength, creativity, drive- or whatever it is that makes you different from everybody else? I don’t want to manipulate your defenses because they are for a reason but if someone like me can try harder than anyone else has before then maybe there’s a chance we’ll make progress someday. When I first saw you, my heart broke into pieces for you.

Only when she let down her guard did things start happening between us in ways nobody expected. It was fast becoming clear that this connection couldn’t go away with one night as intended; not even an hour after we first saw each other, it was already too late.

And I don’t want to be the one who is wrong about us because all of this feels so right- even when we’re not talking or doing anything at all.

When I first saw you, my heart broke into pieces for you. Your eyes make me feel like a thousand people are watching me and your smile makes me forget there’s anything in life that can get me down. The way you just have faith in everything around us without question somehow makes it easier for anyone else to do the same thing.* ** And as much as logic tells me that some things won’t come together no matter how hard we try, I know deep inside that if nothing else, this is worth fighting for.

* * * I know that this thing between us can be anything we want it to be and my only wish is that you’ll let me help you see how amazing things could really become if we take the time to make them happen. It’s not going to be easy, but nothing worth having ever is- even though sometimes the things worth finding are always right in front of our eyes without us realizing it. ** When I first saw you, a part of me knew before any words were ever spoken or actions taken what was waiting on the other side of your smile; and now as I stand here with everything finally feeling possible again, there seems like no better way to put into words just how thankful I am than to say thank you for giving me the chance to see what it’s like to truly feel alive.

I know that this thing between us can be anything we want it to be and my only wish is that you’ll let me help you see how amazing things could really become if we take the time to make them happen. It’s not going to be easy, but nothing worth having ever is- even though sometimes the things worth finding are always right in front of our eyes without us realizing it. When I first saw you, a part of me knew before any words were ever spoken or actions taken what was waiting on the other side of your smile; and now as I stand here with everything finally feeling possible again, I can’t help but hope that you feel it too.

I know the fear of trusting again is always going to be there – not for me, but for us both- and even though we’ll have our ups and downs, my only prayer is that together we’re strong enough to make it through anything life throws at us because in a world where so much feels uncertain right now, one thing’s certain: being with you has made everything worth living again.*

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